About 3 weeks after my 19th birthday(and wedding) I found out I was pregnant with my daughter, Summer. My new husband and I were a mix of emotions. Excited, scared, freaked out, happy.. all of it. I loved my little baby belly. As soon as I was big enough to look pregnant I wore my growing baby with pride. One day(about 5 months in) I noticed my first stretch mark. It was about a 1/2 an inch long and not very noticeable at all. The next day, there were about 10 in that same spot, and I cried- just like a hormonal pregnant woman would. About a week after that I had that deciding sonogram, the one that would tell us the sex of our baby.
“It’s a girl!”
I was elated. Then something else.. A “hmm” and then “well.. the doctor will be able to tell more” was all I got then they sent my to my OB. Apparently there was an abnormality. My wonderful, sweet, tiny little baby may be in trouble. “We have to scheduel another ultrasound. No need to stress about it now. But I wouldn’t rule out anything from cystic phybrosis to Downsyndrome.” Suddenly everything I had in me was begging for those little marks on my belly to be my biggest concern again. Weeks passed before we found out any more, weeks filled with lots of crying, and praying. Then came the moment of truth. I placed all my hopes and fears in the hands of this stranger, a perinatologist, and I know he could see in my eyes- my pleading with him to tell me that everything would be ok. That my daughter would come into this world healthy and happy.
Good news, whatever was there before was no where to be found. All that the sonogram showed was one perfectly perfect baby girl. MY baby girl. After that, every mark, every pound, every crazy way my body distorted itself from my pre-pregnancy form.. just meant I was that much closer to meeting my miracle. It all meant she was getting that much bigger, that much healthier.. and I would endure so much more than some purple streaks on my belly to get my daughter to me safely.
Now when I see my stretch marks, my extra skin and flab, I see stregnth. I see how much I cried, and also hard I worked to keep myself together for her. I see the love in her eyes when I looked into them for the very first time. I see her daddy, my husband, craddling my belly every night while we slept. I hear those life changing words, “There’s nothing to worry about. She’s going to be a healthy baby girl.”
Thank you so much for this site. It brought tears to my eyes. Such wonderful stories, such beautiful babies and VERY beautiful mothers. It’s really a great thing you are doing.
~Number of pregnancies and births: 1
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: My only daughter is 14 months old.