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Learning to Love my 21 Year Old Baby Body (Anonymous)

December 9, 2008

I’ve been through a lot in my short 21 years and 10 months here on earth. The good, the bad, the unexpected… In high school I was a 5’3, 117 pound cheerleader with an eating disorder. I was teased when I was younger for being chubby, so I made up for it during my adolescence. I hid the memories of my broken childhood with alcohol, prescription pills, and eventually hard drugs. All of which helped me to maintain my thin frame. When I was 16, I met who would one day become my husband. Fast forward to college, by the time I was a Junior I was 130 lbs. I was okay with this, I had grown out of my self-destructive behavior for the most part, but my weight was still a burden on my mind every day. I was living with my high school sweetheart when we found out we were pregnant on Thanksgiving of 2007. Three semesters away from attaining my degree and suddenly it seemed so far away. I took a year off from school, sat at home and ate, and ate, ate… Over the course of my pregnancy I gained 73 lbs. The day I went into labor I weighed a whopping 203 lbs, most of which I gained in the last 3 months of my pregnancy, leaving me with numerous stretch marks on my hips, my breasts, thighs and calves. Thirty hours of labor and six hours of pushing later, my baby boy was born at 8 lbs 9 oz. and 21 inches. A week later what I was left with was 180 lbs, nearly a hundred stretch marks and some saggy skin. Despite my previous obsession over my body image, I became less concerned with it, and instead focused my attention on my new son. With the help of breastfeeding, I lost nearly 40 lbs in the first two months. My weight loss began to slow, so when I stopped breastfeeding at 3 months post-partum, I began eating healthier. I am proud to say that today, on my son’s 4 month birthday, I weighed in at 145 lbs. I am still overweight for my height; however I have never been more content with or proud of my body. I look at my son everyday with pride, and when I look at my stretch marks they remind me of that precious little face. I am going back to school in January to finish my degree, and thanks to my beautiful little interruption, I have all the motivation I need. The attached pictures are, in order: my pre-pregnancy body, my 38 week pregnant body, my one week pp body, my 1 month pp body, my present body, and my baby boy…








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16 Responses to “Learning to Love my 21 Year Old Baby Body (Anonymous)”

  1. Mary Says:
    December 9th, 2008 at 11:45 am

    You look just like me! …Accept I am 7 months preggo with my second and not trying to gain as much as I did with my first, our numbers match up with the first pregnancy, the stretch marks fade alot, and your tummy looks like it is nice a firm again, thats great! I think you look terrific, and its hard to accept the changes your body has made, I hope this website gives you comfort!

  2. Amanda Says:
    December 9th, 2008 at 1:29 pm

    You look great!!! And your baby boy is precious!

  3. charity Says:
    December 9th, 2008 at 4:16 pm

    can i just say WOW! what a transformation! you look GREAT now! and i don’t even see any stretchies on your tummy now! thanks for giving me hope!

  4. tamara Says:
    December 10th, 2008 at 4:04 pm

    wow!! ur belly looks flawless now!!! i only wish wish mine would look even a little like yours!! i too had a pretty slamming body at 20 and pregnancy did me wrong lol…but ur right…u learn to accept it and take all of the attention into your child…its amazing what a womens body can do….im on here too if you wanna see under 19 and insecure (tamara) hope to hear from ya!

  5. angelica Says:
    December 10th, 2008 at 6:57 pm

    hi!!
    i have a baby girl! and she is also 4 months old!!
    i gain about 13 kilos during my pregnancy!, i still have overweigth but when i look at my baby girl!! i am happy i couldn’t ask more!!
    search my post so you can see me and give your opinnion “VCC”
    My baby was born on july 21

  6. anne Says:
    December 11th, 2008 at 12:52 pm

    Wow… you really do look amazing now. He is cute as a button!!!

  7. ashleigh Says:
    December 12th, 2008 at 7:53 pm

    thanks so much ladies, i never got any strech marks on the front of my stomach, just my hips and pretty much the rest of my body.. and since this was written i have lost 2 more lbs for a total of 60 lbs in almost 5 months! i’m very proud of what i have achieved, even if i never get back to my old body, which, i most likely wont.. but really, if i can do it, you can too!

  8. Rebecca Says:
    December 13th, 2008 at 7:09 pm

    You look amazing!! Your son is gorgeous.
    Great job :)

  9. Lesley Says:
    December 13th, 2008 at 8:22 pm

    You look absolutley amazing!! And what a beautiful baby! Wow!!

  10. helenaleigh Says:
    December 14th, 2008 at 3:23 pm

    girlfriend, you are beautiful. it’s funny to me how similiar our stories are. i’m married to my highschool sweetheart, the only thing i did during my pregnancy was eat eat eat, i also weighed 203 lbs the day of delivery. my little girl weighed in at 8 lbs 3 oz, and she was 21 inches long too. i was 20 when she was born, and now, watching her grow to now 19 months, i have learned to love my body again. don’t for one second be ashamed of your body. you are absolutely beautiful, and you can tell from your photos that you have undergone what most women are still learning, and may never do. learn to love themselves again after a baby. cherish what you have, and who you are.

    blessings. :]

  11. Tricia Says:
    December 15th, 2008 at 3:49 pm

    Curves are beautiful girl!

  12. ashleigh Says:
    December 17th, 2008 at 6:02 pm

    helenaleigh, that’s amazing how similar our stories are! wow!

    honestly, at first i was ashamed of my body, for years all i had known was this obsession over my figure.. but now, 5 months later, i can say that i’m not ashamed of it anymore, i look at my thin girlfriends and tell myself, they didn’t give birth! i think i look pretty damn good considering what my body has been through.. gaining 73 pounds in 9 months and losing 60 in 5.. i’m proud, and proud of what it has given me!

  13. chelsea Says:
    December 18th, 2008 at 11:18 am

    God girl, you look great!

  14. Angele Says:
    December 20th, 2008 at 9:11 am

    Amazing transformation!You should be proud of that body.. flaunt that!!

  15. London Says:
    July 14th, 2009 at 6:04 am

    This helps!!!! alot…
    i’m 23 expecting my first i’m 5’3 and weighed
    49 kg’s before hand i’m only 4 1/2 months in and I have gained 6 kilos it’s not easy to look in the mirror but im sure it’s all worth it thanks for the reminder.
    L

  16. Laurie Says:
    March 15th, 2010 at 1:11 pm

    Congratulations for really telling it like it is! You seem to have developed a very healthy attitude about your wt. and body shape and I applaud you for that, especially with a history of an eating disorder! I am a nurse who has worked with many types of eating disorders and I know how difficult they are to overcome. I started reading these blogs and yours stuck out because you have a certain honesty about you. The article I read in todays paper seemed to have the mother blaming her kids for her weight gain and the inability to do anything about it. As a mother of two grown children I know that what made me gain unsightly pounds during my second pregnancy was what I ATE! In other words donut fat NOT baby fat! Our bodies bounce back quite well if we do not eat for four while we claim to be eating for two. Your body is beautiful now! Continue to eat healthy foods and you will also pass that gift (of eating right) on to your son. Good luck with your return to college. P.S. That baby is adorable!

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