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Just a few degrees south (Anonymous)

February 15, 2010

I had my first two children when I was 21 and 23. The pregnancies themselves were perfectly normal and healthy, but I was pretty depressed because the father wanted nothing to do with them. He tried to convince me to abort both times right up until the third trimester. I left him when our second child was a few months old. I went back to school and got my life together. Then, I met a wonderful man who loved my children almost more than I did. We got a married a few years later and then, learned we were pregnant with twins. I had said I didn’t want to have children after 30, so it was perfect timing. Like my first two, this pregnancy was fairly normal and healthy, but I experienced intense pain in my pelvic. I had something called pubic symphosis separation. My midwife wasn’t familiar with it, but she’d sent me to a physical therapist. I worked right up until the day I went into labor at 35 weeks. I had gone in for a regular appointment and the midwife checked to see if I was having real contractions or just more of the braxton-hicks variety. Turned out I was dilated to four and in full labor – I didn’t even know it. I’d been having contractions for 6 weeks and they felt the same to me.

I’d hoped to have a natural delivery, but both babies were breech. They were born via c-section four hours later. My husband cried as he held his children for the first time. I struggled not to panic and to keep my feelings of complete failure to myself. I had really hoped for a natural birth. Honestly, it wasn’t until I read Colleen’s Ode To My Scar on this site that I began to feel differently about it all.

I have always been plus sized, but after the twins, I shed weight very fast. I now weigh less than I did on my wedding day, but I just have all this skin lined with stretch marks. My husband thinks I am beautiful, and the beauty he sees is reflected in his eyes every time he looks at me. That’s what has helped me come to terms with the amazing body I have now.

This is me at 33 weeks and then today, 11 months pp.

~Age: 31
~Number of pregnancies and births: 3 pregnancies, 4 children
~The age of your children, or how far postpartum you are: 10, 8, 1 year old twins.

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3 Responses to “Just a few degrees south (Anonymous)”

  1. Colleen Says:
    February 15th, 2010 at 5:16 pm

    I’m so glad to know that I could help. Welcome to the club; wear your membership badge with pride! :)

  2. Shanyn Says:
    February 17th, 2010 at 4:13 pm

    You are gorgeous. And thank you so much for sharing your story!

  3. john Says:
    February 26th, 2010 at 4:57 pm

    I really love your curves

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