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I may not be beautiful anymore, but my son is (Anonymous)

February 18, 2009

I’ll admit, it’s hard to look in the mirror these days. I use to be beautiful. I was vain too… I liked the way people treated me because of it. These days, I feel frumpy. I feel like an alien in my own body. Sex with my husband is not what it use to be. It’s hard to be sexy when you don’t feel like you are! I’m embarrassed for him to see me naked. I think that god took away my beauty to give it to my son. He’s perfect. He’s healthy, strong, and absolutely amazing. I think I am a selfish mom because I wish I still felt that way about myself :( shouldn’t a perfect baby feel worth it? I wish it felt worth it like everyone says. But it doesn’t :(





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28 Responses to “I may not be beautiful anymore, but my son is (Anonymous)”

  1. Denise Says:
    February 18th, 2009 at 9:45 pm

    You are still beautiful but just in a different way. Your son and husband probably see the beauty you are unable to see right now. ((hugs))

  2. mrs. petunia Says:
    February 18th, 2009 at 10:42 pm

    Hi honey,
    I don’t think you are selfish at all! I know you’re grateful for your son but there is still a sense of loss when something so intimate and personal like our own body goes ahead and changes so quickly on us. This is normal and nothing to be ashamed of. Also, about your being vain prebaby….nothing wrong with that either. Society tells us that women should get their sense of worth from the way they look. And when they actually do…then it tells us we are shallow/vain/selfish. Well isn’t this an impossible double standard! And….Importantly, you are still incredibly beautiful and sexy! Those stretch marks are gonna fade and then all you will see is your nice flat post baby stomach (which it is you lucky girl), your cinched in waist and your breasts which are still high and lovely! Good luck and take it a bit easy on yourself:)

  3. Claire Says:
    February 19th, 2009 at 3:11 am

    You have only stretch marks, no saggy skin – these will fade so much.

    You have kept your perky figure, be thankful for what you have. You are still very beautiful and yes – your son is unbelievably so!

  4. J Says:
    February 19th, 2009 at 3:50 am

    Oh you are beautiful!

  5. shelly Says:
    February 19th, 2009 at 7:05 am

    Not beautiful? You look great. Besides, don’t measure yourself by what society might say is beautiful.

  6. Sussanna Says:
    February 19th, 2009 at 8:14 am

    You are very beautiful. You have a gorgeous healthy body. The stretch marks will fade away until barely noticeable, love it, respect it and norish it and you will feel beautiful again!

  7. tamara Says:
    February 19th, 2009 at 2:35 pm

    WOW!! u took the words right out of my thoughts! i too, used to take A LOT of pride into my looks…in fact, you could say i relied on them with everything i did…and after i had my son…my body was just destroyed…sometimes i look at myself and almost feel numb to the thought of it…like “it cant be possible that my body looks like this” …and i know what ur going through i really do…all i can say is time will heal the thoughts…im 15pp and i have my good days and my bad but when it comes down to it…me feeling depressed and numb to the thought isnt going to change the way it looks…plus…i wanna be able to happy for my son…cz i dont want him to see me like that…it will get better…the stretch marks fade…i promise! im on here too under 14months post partum (tamara)..u can see how much they have faded…take care girl…and keep ur head up..ur still beautiful!!

  8. karina Says:
    February 20th, 2009 at 9:47 am

    Dont worry mama, You look GREAT! I have stretch marks in a lot more places than you and I was TINY when I got pregnant. I have them like up to 2 inches inder my boobs soooo dont fret too much sweetheart! You look amazing… I on the other hand wish I was as lucky as you… :)

  9. chelsea Says:
    February 20th, 2009 at 2:55 pm

    You look great girl.
    Give yourself more credit! Rock that body!
    Those stretch marks will fade eventually too. Don’t sweat it!

    Beauty fades eventually with all of us, but yours hasn’t!

  10. chelsea Says:
    February 20th, 2009 at 2:58 pm

    Your hips look much better anyways because you have a more hour-glass shape. I like the shape of your body now better…You’ve got hips!

  11. Sarah Says:
    February 21st, 2009 at 12:43 am

    Not beautiful anymore??????? You’re wrong. You look so BEAUTIFUL!!!!!! So Gorgeous!!! You have no idea how lucky are to have such an amazing post partum body!!!

  12. paddfoot Says:
    February 23rd, 2009 at 2:36 am

    your really hot,as a rule moms are hotter than non moms, there is more respect involved, either way, your very pretty and i hope you feel better

  13. Lindsey Says:
    February 23rd, 2009 at 2:18 pm

    GIRL GET IN THE TANNING BED! Your stretch marks will fade even if you cant tan! Dont get down on yourself! You are PERFECT! You should be proud of your body!

  14. Melanie Says:
    February 24th, 2009 at 10:42 pm

    you got your overall shape back, it’s just the stretch marks that i see. they will fade, it just feels bad right now. if you tan wait until your stretch marks fade or else they’ll get worse and take longer to heal. don’t worry too much or feel too much guilt. many women DO have feelings like what you feel. just know, this really is temporary. i’m pregnant now and haven’t gotten stretch marks yet BUT when i went through puberty i got a TON of stretch marks and it looked soo bad, but then… they faded and i’ve always been super happy with my body and have always gotten compliments, and i hardly see them.. this will happen to you too! so chill out, they’ll go away and just take this time of healing to focus on other things… you’ll get it back babe!! (and your son really is quite handsome!)

  15. 7mama Says:
    February 24th, 2009 at 11:27 pm

    I am in tears reading through the stories on this site. I can relate in many ways, I had stretch marks JUST like this with my first son and they got worse with my second son…but now they are like a badge of honor that I am proud of honestly! Like a tattoo that says I am a MAMA!! I tell my sons-”see look this is were I grew for you! I have them on my breast, tummy, thighs, butt, lower back, even a bit on the insides of my knees and I am thin like you! It’s genetics! I say get a great tat over them if you really can’t take em and LOVE YOUR SKIN!!

  16. Jenn Says:
    March 15th, 2009 at 12:11 pm

    I totally know where you’re coming from. I feel like my body was robbed from me. I feel guilty b/c I should feel like it was worth it to have my son, who I also feel is absolutely gorgeous. Everyone tells me he should me modelling, in magazines, etc…but it’s hard when you yourself feel like your looks have been taken away. :( I also don’t like my husband to see my naked anymore. Heck, I don’t like to see me naked! But your body shape looks great and those stretch marks will fade over time, you’ll see. You’re gorgeous and young and you’ll bounce back!

  17. Jamie Says:
    April 28th, 2009 at 8:00 pm

    you still have a GREAT looking body

  18. tailor Says:
    April 29th, 2009 at 8:44 am

    I was just the opposite, very modest about my looks. I never knew how much I’d look back and wish I had flaunted myself more often. I never wore a two piece then and now, never will. I too can’t be comfortable during sex, it’s humiliating to me not to be confident. Wish I felt it was worth it too.

  19. velisha Says:
    June 1st, 2009 at 8:29 pm

    You were perfect. Now you look very good! I love your breast! Are you done with the breastfeeding?

  20. Laura Says:
    July 6th, 2009 at 7:52 pm

    You are still exceptionally beautiful. I don’t think anyone could argue that. Your stretch marks will fade. You got your figure right back, it does not look as though you even got any loose skin. So moisturize, know that the marks will fade and in the meantime if it bothers you – dermablend for the beach. Because you do need to rock a bikini with that figure. No you are not selfish at all, I know exactly how you feel. But as time goes on, you will get your confidence back.

  21. Greg Says:
    August 24th, 2009 at 6:57 am

    You still are beautiful. You look great, and you shouldn’t feel at all embarrassed about letting him see you naked.

  22. Tasha Says:
    November 14th, 2009 at 12:54 am

    I think you still look great, but I can totally relate exactly to your story. I was very much like you, and loved my body before…and loved to show it off. Now I can’t stand it and cry almost everytime I look in the mirror. My youngest son is 2 yrs old in a couple of weeks…and I have still not let my husband see me naked in the light…and even in the dark I stay covered up as much as possible. It limits us in the bedroom as well bc I’m so self-concious and feel so un-atractive. Its very difficult to learn to love this new body….I don’t think I will ever be there. So even though you DO look great…I seriously relate to how you feel. I can guarantee you look a million times better than me.

  23. anonymous Says:
    January 11th, 2010 at 2:10 pm

    you know what i like best about the first picture? the cockiness you bring, the “this is me” attitude you have.

    be proud of the new body too. you have a great figure, it’s just a little different from the one you had before. you’re a strong beautiful woman, flaunt it again! :-)

  24. John Says:
    February 2nd, 2010 at 12:39 pm

    You are very beautiful – don’t ever say that you aren’t

  25. Marz Says:
    June 9th, 2010 at 7:13 pm

    Girl, you still look ridiculously good for having a baby. I know it’s not what you want to hear– you just want to look good with no circumstances applied. Your husband might be treating you differently because on top of being a father, you’re down on yourself and not feeling sexy– and that effects your relationship.
    If you’re ashamed for him to see you naked, try being intimate with the lights out. When I was younger (and thinner, go figure) I used to demand the lights out because I was so ashamed of my body.
    If you re-introduce that “spark” maybe it’ll be easier for you to feel as beautiful as everyone is saying you are :) And maybe soon you’ll have the ighs on to celebrate your post-by body!

  26. Ruby Says:
    May 19th, 2011 at 5:53 am

    I know how you feel, when you say it should feel like it’s worth it but it doesn’t feel that way. I don’t have stretch marks but My skin on my belly is loose, I have a scar from a c-section, and I stopped nursing and now one breast is noticeably larger than the other. I also still have that line down my belly. I too am ashamed for my boyfriend to see me naked. I think the last time he saw me naked was at the hospital and after seeing me like that I don’t know how he can still find me sexy. You have a great body, much better than mine before pregnancy. Soon those stretch marks will fade and you’ll feel a lot better.

  27. Shawn Says:
    August 23rd, 2013 at 6:09 pm

    Wow, very much wow. You are still very beautiful. Hopefully after all this time you have come to realize this. :)

  28. Chuck Says:
    November 14th, 2013 at 4:41 pm

    I have to agree with all those that say you are beautiful. Over time our bodies change. You are still very sexy and desire able looking.

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