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Changes (Anonymous)

January 3, 2014

My body is a blessing. Before now I wasn’t so sure. Ironically, though I had given birth 4 times vaginally (twice without meds) it took my emergency c-section to show me just how wonderful my body is. I’m not skinny, I haven’t been since my first pregnancy in high school, I have stretch marks and loose skin, cellulite, freckles and scars. I have carried seven people with in me. 5 made it earth side and 2 were called home. My body has given life and it has experienced terrible loss. The BMI index considers me over weight, and I’m ok with it. I have a scar now that is the biggest one on my body. The deepest. And it’s so beautiful. I can’t express to you just how in love with my scar that I am. I look at it and I know that we survived. We made it. No matter what I feel victorious in how I birthed my son. So please, c-section Mama’s, don’t think that because you didn’t give birth vaginally that you didn’t do something amazing. I’ve given birth just about every way that someone CAN give birth and I promise you, you’re all big damn heroes to me :) . You have that scar and your baby is here, it may not have been the birth you wanted, and next time you’re going to crush that VBAC if you go for it (I have faith in you) but please, in between now and then just remember that you’re beautiful, and that you’re no less of a woman because you had MAJOR surgery to get that baby here. Because from my experience, that takes as much of a birth warrior as squatting down and pushing baby out. <3

Age: 23
Number of pregnancies and births: 7 pregnancies 7 births 5 live births (4 mine one surro babe)
number of children: 7, 3, 1 and 1 month

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13 Responses to “Changes (Anonymous)”

  1. Kristi Says:
    January 3rd, 2014 at 9:20 am

    I love your attitude, I’m 20 and had my first baby and I’ve had days where I love my body and days where I don’t, but your words made me feel truely blessed that I was able to be a home for my child and my scars are always memories and knowing that he once lived there. Our bodies do so much for our children and it’s worth it. You look beautiful!

  2. Maria Says:
    January 4th, 2014 at 12:21 am

    I have to say it, you rock! This made me so happy and inspired to read, thanks :). You look amazing!

  3. Shae Says:
    January 7th, 2014 at 2:21 pm

    You look amazing and your encouraging words were well received.

  4. sara Says:
    January 7th, 2014 at 11:35 pm

    Your body is beautiful as is your inspirational attitude!

  5. Amanda Says:
    January 9th, 2014 at 10:40 pm

    This is mine. : ) Thank you all so much for all of the positive feedback! Motherhood is a beautiful thing, no matter how we come into it. I think it’s so sad that as a society doesn’t celebrate and appreciate it like we should. Weather it’s your first or twelfth, your babies are earth side or angels, you are all beautiful and wonderful and deserve to be celebrated. <3

  6. Amanda Says:
    January 9th, 2014 at 11:42 pm

    Rather as a society we don’t appreciate it like we should * Sorry for the error, my little guy is sick and I haven’t been sleeping well the last couple of nights.

  7. Jason Says:
    January 10th, 2014 at 12:09 pm

    I love my wife’s c-section scar and her stretch marks, and her extra weight in the midsection, and she has no clue why. I love all these things because they’re a reminder that I’m a father with her, and that we’re doing it together with love and teamwork. Those marks, to me, are a symbol of us together, and I wouldn’t change them for the world.

  8. Amanda Says:
    January 14th, 2014 at 5:56 pm

    Thank you for that Jason! Men like you and my husband are the kind of men I’d love for my daughter to marry, and my sons to grow up to be.

  9. Steph Says:
    January 15th, 2014 at 7:53 pm

    As a fellow c-section momma you ROCK!!!!! Love what you wrote here!!!

  10. Michelle Says:
    January 20th, 2014 at 2:30 am

    You are amazing! How do you do it? How do you love your scar? How does it feel like victory? I want that, too! I cannot stand the sight of my scar, the roll of skin hanging over as if trying to hide the scar. I cannot touch it, I don’t want my husband to see it ir touch it, it is a constant reminder of failure to me. Failure-whose? My biody failed me. Maybe the midwives who attended my labor at home and then abandoned me at hospital? It’s been OVER TWO years, how long does this take? I cannot let it go. Why?? My child is perfect, but all I can see is the years of infertility, the failure to conceive-had to depend on a Petri dish and someone else’s genes to make it happen. But I grew her, I did that part. I couldn’t make her or birth her. But I grew her. And I still cannot let the surgery go. It’s so pathetic.

  11. Megan Says:
    January 27th, 2014 at 9:25 pm

    This post is awesome! To Michelle, you are NOT pathetic. I’ve had to c-sections due to a rare uteran condition. The first one took me years to get over. It’s traumatic. It’s major surgery. I was completely unprepared for it after my NP told me I “definitely” wouldn’t need a c-section. With my second child (22 months) I’m at peace with it. I really wanted to try a VBAC but she was breech and due to my other complications I just couldn’t do it. Having a bicornuate uterus, which most people have never heard of, makes things more complicated. I figure it’s a miracle that my children are here. My second pregnancy was really tough. I felt sick constantly. I was racked with worry knowing this time around that I was high-risk was scary.
    If you have a healthy baby that’s a victory. Getting over the surgery is tough and it takes a long time to make peace with. Maybe talk to someone if it will help. How you feel is normal. I felt that way too. Like my body failed me. You are not alone. I wish I could give you the magic answer but you have to find you’re own peace somehow. Don’t worry. You’ll get there

  12. Nor Says:
    February 5th, 2014 at 12:50 am

    That is a intimidating number of pregnancies in such a short time! You look great too. Oh, to be 23…

  13. Tomi Says:
    April 16th, 2014 at 12:20 pm

    You’re so lucky! You have great boobs, and nice ass. I have neither of those.

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