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Breast woes and appreciation .. (Anonymous)

Hello, im 36 and have 2 beautiful children ? aged 12 and 7.

My first pregnancy came at a time of such a huge loss. Only months before a huge part of my life passed away and the grief was immersurable. The pregnancy brought to us such excitement. I neglected to think what i ate would forever change my body. I thought i could eat what i want and at the end the weight would drop off and all would return to normal! Yikes was i delusional. Little size 8 grew to a 16!! Im short so the weight gain caused stretch marks on my tummy, breasts and my thighs and even calves! I had dark marks all over my tummy and i was so ashamed of my naked body. I was so depressed but so in love with my bundle of joy. He brought so much love into our lives that helped with healing such a broken heart.

I got post natal drepression and PTSD and lost a lot of weight fast. My stretch marks faded to mostly indented silvery lines i went Back to a size 8 by time he was 1. My once were gorgeous perky boobs were saggy and unrecognisable. My nipples had grown so much bigger through pregnancy and not returned to the size they had been. My tummy was more like a bobbly pouch. I hated my breasts so much i tried to wrap them with long cloth so they would be pressed hard against my body so i didnt notice them as much.

5 years later i was pregnant with my second son. I didnt gain as much weight with him and loved my milky boobies that were huge! It gave me a bit more cinfidence however during breast feeding i put on a lot more weight and have yo yo’d ever since hovering between a size 8 to 12. At the moment im a large 12 but hope to get back on top of healthy eating and exercise to drop the extra weight.

I have obsessed about my boobs and dream of having breast augmentation. I’ve researched other women who have gone through with it and love their results! But because finances won’t allow it i will accept what i have for the time being ? im grateful i naturally birthed 2 beautiful boys and was able to nourish them with breast feeding. The first had BM for 5 months due to complications and the second till aged close to 2 years old.

I love being a mother! i have a love-hate relationship with my body’s appearance however mostly im grateful and in awe of what it can do! Birthing and raising children has been the biggest blessing i could ever be bestowed and im forever grateful for such a privilege ?

Huge thanks to all the mothers sharing their stories on this page. You have helped me more than you can ever imagine! It helped me normalise my mother body and accept it. Xxx

in 5+ Years Postpartum, Belly, Breasts, Mom over 30, Postpartum, PPD - Postpartum Depression, Second Pregnancy, Submissions

3 comments… add one

  • RachelT Wednesday, October 4, 2017, 5:37 am

    you could have eaten well and still had stretch marks…pregnancy itself is sometimes all that is to blame, don’t beat yourself up!!

  • hollie Saturday, October 7, 2017, 3:17 pm

    Wow, you look amazing and your breasts are beautiful. I honestly think you don’t need surgery you look perfect as you are! Be proud of your body and who you are, you look great X

  • Richard Sunday, October 8, 2017, 6:35 pm

    As a father who’s experienced the changing body of a mother during and after pregancy, I can fully understand why you have a love-hate relationship with your body. As far as the pictures tell, your stretch marks are practically invisible now. Your stomach is incredible after all the changes in size, whether that being the pregnancy or the shifting of weight. It’s truly amazing what a woman’s body can endure. However, it’s your breasts which surprised me the most. A quick look at the pictures and I thought you had already had breast augmentation, only to read your post to find out that they’re completely natural.
    Pregancy/parenthood brings a whole lot of joy, but it does bring body confidence issues also, however you’re looking great.

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